Thursday, November 30, 2006


I have a cough. It's really nothing to complain about, especially compared with this one girl who was out for about a month with meningitis (I guess she caught it from herself a few times... how sad!). I like having an excuse to be grumpy, get more sleep, and slack off.

I had a strange dream last night. I was playing chess with one of my professors in the spring outside the HFAC. I was winning - my king was completely surrounded by pawns (so it was safe!), and I had a queen to take out the king. I looked away for a moment and suddenly my professor had taken a knight and put it on the board to checkmate me (okay, I don't think that really could have happened in that situation, but it is a dream after all). Later I dreamt that a classmate of mine was fainting, and I was like "it's a vasovagal response" (I'm a nerd even in my dreams). Then I was stuck in a room, and there was going to be a recital, and my professor told me I was supposed to play the Poulenc sonata. I was like, "let me go get my flute... do I have an accompanist?" And then I thought about how bad I would sound. I was relieved to wake up.

Maybe this dream means that I feel like my professor always has some kind of trump card over me, and that it isn't fair. I also feel like I have to do what my professors tell me to do, even if I'm bad at it or disagree with knowledge I have to apply.

I've been listening to Death Cab for Cutie's "Someday You Will Be Loved." It's a sad song, yet optimistic. Like a dove dying into a better day, or a bluebird without wings dreaming about flying.

1 comment:

Portia said...

You think "Someday You Will Be Loved" is optimistic? I always thought it was the most depressing one on the album--the type you listen to when someone has dumped you.